


Cool, Cool, Cool

by puffintalia



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M, Pining, That's An Important One, They barely know each other, but hey den's just Like That, denmark is pining, ice is here for like two sentences and he's not even named, im new to this idk what this is, norway is probably oblivious, romania is named exactly once at the end, vaguely dennor, very vaguely
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2019-07-23
Packaged: 2020-06-22 09:05:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19664212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puffintalia/pseuds/puffintalia
Summary: Matthias has had a crush on his next-door neighbour since... well, it feels like forever. A sudden surprise visit reminds him that maybe it's important to seperate fantasy from reality.





	1. A Neighbour

**Author's Note:**

> hi pls be nice to me this is my first fanfic ever  
> constructive criticism would be appreciated im still trying to figure out how this works  
> ao3 stop telling me im spelling things wrong im just british

Lukas was handsome, there was no denying it. Every morning, he rushed past Matthias on his way to work, his beautiful blond hair shining in the early sun. They’d exchanged a few words, once or twice – “Cold one today, isn’t it?” – but never anything more. And somehow, Matthias realised, despite this, he’d fallen head over heels for his local pretty Norwegian.

At some point over the two years since Lukas had moved into the neighbourhood, Matthias had grown to look forward to their brief meetings. He found himself waiting outside his house every morning, coming up with some imaginary task to pretend to be doing as he worked up the courage to finally say something more. Matthias had never been one to shy away from a conversation – always quite the opposite - but something about his favourite neighbour tied his tongue and set miniature wings a-flutter in his chest until it took all his effort to stay composed enough to pass off as much as a simple comment on the weather. Oh well. At least it meant his garden was looking better than it ever had.

It was Lukas he was thinking about on one certain warm afternoon in mid-July. Matthias was cooking dinner, the same old spaghetti Bolognese he’d done every Monday for as long as he could remember, and, as usual, the monotony lulled him into a recurring daydream.

_A warm home, filled with blankets and cushions and plush comforts of every kind, with long curtains fluttering in a slight breeze. A playful voice chimes in the hallway and a small child pushes through the door, shepherded by a tall, blond man with soft, intelligent eyes and a loving half-smile, a subtle delight at their happy domesticity. The child giggles and reaches forward, chanting, “Pappa, pappa! Up!” as he clings onto long legs. Matthias beams at his son, lifting him up as he meets the gaze of –_

Every day, the same daydream, yet still Matthias could never get used to seeing Lukas’ smile so vividly in his mind. He shook his head, trying to dislodge the thought. He and Lukas had barely even spoken to each other; it was unrealistic and childish and frankly, kind of creepy that he spent so much time fantasising about a future life together.

He was still pissed off at his own imagination when he heard a harsh tap, tap, tap on the door. Despite his efforts to ignore it, the noise kept increasing in an incessant crescendo, drowning out the loud rock music blasting from the kitchen radio. “Coming!” he yelled, as the impatient visitor began to attack the doorbell instead. Matthias shifted his pan onto a cooler section of the stove-top and flung open the door, expecting a deliveryman or some sort of Jehovah’s Witness to bug him.

Instead, he found himself eye to eye with none other than Lukas himself, holding a plastic carrier bag full of – shampoo? The summer sun outlined his pale hair like an angelic halo, highlighting the perfect, soft angles of his face and his high, proud, handsome cheekbones. Matthias blushed bright scarlet, barely stammering out a quiet, high-pitched greeting. _What was Lukas doing here? Did he know? Could he read minds? Oh God, what if he can read minds? He was in so much trouble. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no._

“Took ya long enough.” Lukas waved his hand in front of Matthias’ transfixed face. “Hey, earth to Matthias.” He invited himself in, stepping through the doorway as Matthias finally seemed to snap back to reality.

  
“Uhhhhhhh, hey! Lukas! Exactly who I expected to show up on my doorstep right now! Yeah, sure! Cool! How’s it going?!” Matthias laughed, scratching his neck. He eyed the contents of Lukas’ bag suspiciously: shower products, a towel and what seemed to be a spare change of clothes neatly folded at the bottom. Almost as if he was going to stay the night – no, brain, let’s not go there right now. “What’re you doing he- I mean, what do you – what’s up?”

“Look, I dunno what your deal is, but my shower just broke and I have a super important date tonight and since you’re probably the only person round here who actually seems chill enough to let me, I’m gonna use yours, ok?” Lukas headed up the stairs, kicking absentmindedly at a pile of books left on the bottom step.

“What? Oh, yeah, sure.” Matthias grinned, giving him a thumbs up. No murder today then. Guess he’s not a mindreader after all. “Bathroom’s second on the right.” He sighed and turned back to his Bolognese, relieved. Then the situation finally clicked to him. “Wait! No! Hang on!” He turned down the music and sprinted upstairs, pushing past a shocked Lukas.

Matthias rushed into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him. Desperately, he gathered up the clothes strewn about the floor and chucked them into the laundry basket. All the rubber ducks piled up on the end of the bath let out a half-hearted squeak as they were shoved into the medicine cabinet, followed by a frog-shaped shower cap that Matthias had owned for as long as he could remember. Running a cloth under the tap, he cleaned out the shower as best as he could, getting rid of that one weird soap stain across the tiles. His heart raced. _Lukas! Here! In his house!_ He couldn’t let him see the mess all over the place. _This isn’t how it’s supposed to go! I’m meant to surprise him with flowers and declare my love for him in a beautiful, flowery speech and then he falls in love with me and we move in together and get a kid and live happily ever after! He’s not meant to just come round for the first time so he can get ready for a… date._

_Oh. Oh no._ A date. Lukas was going on a date. With someone else. And it was important. Lukas was already in a relationship. An important relationship. Oh no.

For a moment, the thought flickered across Matthias’ mind. _Sabotage him!_ it screamed, crying for attention. _Don’t let him pick someone else!_ He swore quietly, knocking a shampoo bottle over. Chest hollow, he put his head in his hands. _This isn’t how it’s meant to go, it’s meant to be romantic, he’s meant to fall in love with you, he thinks you’re a weirdo, everything’s wrong, everything’s wrong. Everything’s wrong._ He muffled a sob as Lukas started knocking on the door (again), straightening up and splashing cold water in his face to help mask his watering eyes and cool his burning cheeks.

“You good?” Lukas’ lilting Norwegian accent carried clearly through the near-silence. The doorknob turned and a concerned – but still beautiful – face appeared, looking from Matthias to the fallen soap to the slowly opening medicine cabinet.

Matthias slammed it shut, a small navy of rubber ducks quacking in protest. “Yeah,” he said, in between quick, heavy breaths. “Just… cleaning. Yeah. You know. Anyway, it’s all yours.” He grinned pathetically, leaving the other man to do as he pleased.

  
The gentle hum of the shower started up as Matthias flopped onto his bed, tears streaming down his face. _He’s in love with someone else. Of course he is_ , he reasoned. They barely even knew each other. Matthias punched the pillow. He was just being an idiot. The world didn’t revolve around him. Of course other people had different feelings. This was fine. Cool, cool, cool.

  
Not cool. Matthias thought back over the last two years he’d known Lukas. Well, not known, exactly. Been vague acquaintances with. But it’d felt like more. In his head, Lukas loved him too; he’d been so caught up in his daydream, his fantasy life, that he’d forgotten the real world. Lukas barely knew him. He was just a friendly neighbour. A friendly face on the morning commute. Someone who could be trusted, yes, but not really a friend. Not exactly first on your list of party invites. He knew Lukas was entitled to a life outside of his own. Fuck, almost every day for Lukas was a life Matthias knew nothing about. Old Johanna over the road said he was a florist, up early every morning to open shop. Matthias smiled at the thought of Lukas with a big bunch of flowers, lovingly crafted. Oh, how he longed to have a house full of bouquets, one in every room, all in different colours of the rainbow. But that wasn’t fair. Lukas didn’t love him. Lukas had no reason to love him. Why, why couldn’t he drill that into his stupid, spiky head?

The shower cut out and he heard shuffling on the other side of the wall. Disturbed by the unexpected silence, Matthias remembered his dinner, left on the stove. Oops. He slid down the bannister – walking’s overrated – and splashed more water in his face from the kitchen sink. He wasn’t even sure it helped, but his mother was convinced and, well, old habits die hard.

Until they suddenly didn’t. This whole experience was new and alien. Lukas was here, in his house. Lukas didn’t love him. Lukas was in his shower. Lukas loved someone else. Lukas, Lukas, _Lukas_.

When Lukas got to the bottom of the stairs, Matthias had already scraped the burnt pasta into the bin. He gave him a weak smile and a thumbs up, admiring how smart and powerful and handsome Lukas looked in his suit. Whoever he was going out with was one lucky guy – or gal, who knows. Matthias felt a surge of jealousy, choking on his plain, sauce-less spaghetti. Damn those pretty boys and their dinner-ruining charms. “Good luck!” he gargled, throwing in an extra thumbs up for… appearance’s sake?

“Thanks. You’re a lifesaver, honest. Well, gotta go. Can’t keep Alin waiting.” Lukas smiled back: the first time Matthias had ever seen it. It was soft and sweet, yet true and joyful and strong and –

By the time Matthias’ heart had slowed to a regular rate, Lukas was already long gone. Well. There was always time to start over tomorrow morning.


	2. Grey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A run-in on the train kickstarts a new bond.

It was around half-six on a mild summer morning, and the sun was already high in the sky.

“Gotcha, you sly bastard!” Matthias pulled his out from the back of the sofa and triumphantly held out his tie in the air. He hopped to slide his shoes onto his feet, struggling to multitask as he tied a wonky knot. _Oh well_ , _as least it’s done. Kinda._

He opened the front door and stumbled onto the front steps, looking out along the street, waiting for – ah. Yes. Lukas. After the events of the previous night, Matthias realised he should probably… re-consider his feelings toward Lukas. For Lukas’ sake. It was a bit weird, really, he’d decided. _Imagine how you’d feel if your other neighbour felt like that about you! That’s just creepy._ Admittedly, Matthias was not a 79-year-old retired butcher with a knife collection so large it covered an entire wall. But still. Weird.

Despite his new – and painful – resolution, he still caught himself hovering on the doorstep longer than he naturally would. Part of him was still desperate to see Lukas’ beautiful face, to not break the tradition he’d slowly built over the past few years. Heart heavy, he set off toward the station. No matter how hard he tried, his mind kept wandering back to last night, the sight of Lukas and his rare, angelic smile wafting through his daydreams again and again and again, like the smell of someone else’s Belgian bun when you skipped breakfast because you were about to miss your train _again, Matthias._

The train left at 6:54am, leaving Matthias two minutes to sprint across the station, dodging crowds and buskers and salesmen. He scanned his rail pass and shot through the barriers, jumping into the last carriage just as the doors closed behind him.

Phew! He gave an exclamation of relief and nodded at a businessman sat next to the door. Walking along the carriage, he saw that his usual seat was taken – probably someone with a one-off conference or something in the capital, who didn’t know about the careful train seat hierarchy. Oh well. Disappointed, Matthias settled for the next-best option, throwing himself down in the seat behind. _Hope going backwards won’t make me throw up._ He said hi to the man opposite him, who barely even looked up from his paper, and began tapping impatiently on the weirdly sticky plastic table.

Another long day in the office, talking to rich clients and cracking jokes everyone pretended were hilarious, but really were more along the lines of _hey, I’m an asshole but not as much as you are, but I gotta pretend I am to get this relationship to work_. Yet another day of snobby, forgettable faces and snobby, just-as-forgettable attitudes. What was it about money that gave everyone a superiority complex?

As he dreaded the interactions and mind-numbing figures of the coming day, Matthias’ mind turned to what he would rather be doing. Art was always a passion of his – he’d dreamed of becoming a tattoo artist, but had given up an apprenticeship to get a degree his parents deemed “more useful”. If only he had a job like Lukas’ – spending every day surrounded by beautiful blossoms and lilies and roses, not the greediest aspects of the human race, making people happy instead of oh-God-get-me-out-of-here bored, making extravagant sculptures of colour, rather than spreadsheets upon spreadsheet upon dull old spreadsheets.

Before he realised it, Matthias was half asleep, his naturally _(it’s not just to spite you, boss, I swear)_ spiky hair flattened against the back of the seat. He was dozing off, fantasising of flowers and ink and light and a little shop of masterpieces, each lovingly created. The low murmur of the train drew him in like a monotonous lullaby, a siren trapping her victims into lives of complacency. Grey walls, grey seats, grey tables, grey carpets, grey hair, grey suits, grey faces, grey lives. Grey numbers on grey spreadsheets, written in greying ink. God, he was sick of it.

“Hey.”

A sudden sound shattered the spell. Matthias’ head shot up and he immediately snapped out of his trance. The man facing him still seemed to be engrossed in his newspaper, so he lifted himself out of his seat and peered around the carriage.

“Behind you, dumbass.”

A familiar voice called from the next row down – Matthias’ usual seat – and he swizzled round so fast he slammed his knee into the armrest. He looked down to see _fucking Lukas of all people oh my God what’s he doing here I’m not ready for this what the hell am I gonna say_ staring up at him, his eyes watery, his handsome face scarred by dark eyebags.

Lukas hugged himself and smiled weakly up at Matthias. He sighed. “Thanks. For last night. I know I didn’t even ask if you were ok with it, so… thanks for dealing with me. It meant a lot.”

His voice, normally rather monotone, somehow felt flatter than before, his lips pressed tight as if he was trying not to betray himself – something about his sagging posture and melancholy voice made Matthias’ chest fall with dread, made him want to run to him and embrace him and tell him that whatever was wrong – whatever had clearly hurt such a beautiful angel – wasn’t going to hurt him anymore, not as long as he was there to protect him and help him and love him and –

 _Shut the fuck up, idiot, he probably thinks you’re a weirdo._ This was a public train, Lukas still barely knew him and there was no way he looked in a fit state to deal with any more of Matthias’ sappy nonsense. _Just play it cool, Matthias. Jut be a friend!_ Heart still fluttering, he leant further over the back of their chairs and sighed back down at him. “You okay?”

Lukas opened his mouth to speak but faltered. He sat in silence for a few seconds, his pale face looking greyer than usual, as if the whole environment was dragging him down. “…Can I come sit with you?”

Matthias stared at him for a second. “Huh? Oh! Yeah! Sure!” He stood up to let Lukas pass him, earning a weird look from the man opposite. “What’s wrong? You seem kinda down - oh shit, did something happen last night? God, I’m sorry.” He reached out to awkwardly pat his neighbour on the back, but Lukas shook his arm off and shifted away from him. _Not a touch-y person. Right. Uhhhh… There goes my one strategy._

Looking at Lukas’ trembling hands and red eyes, Matthias could tell that he’d been badly hurt. He seemed avoidant, trying to dodge the issue, but he’d _asked_ to sit with him. Matthias had figured out over the past few years that Lukas didn’t have many close friends – no one to really confide in or go to for help. As he sat hunched over in the seat next to him, Lukas appeared like an anxious child: desperately needing to reach out to someone, but too scared and proud to ever ask.

Matthias smiled at him, still kinda in shock that Lukas had picked him of all people. _Probably didn’t mean anything._ He placed his hand next to Lukas’ and they sat in silence for a few minutes. _This is… ok. He just needs someone, right? He can open up when he wants to._

Lukas smiled back at him, a weak gesture that for a split second betrayed both pain and hope. Then it broke again, and Lukas’ blank façade returned, his pale hair falling over his eye. He exhaled heavily and sat in silence for a few more seconds before –

“He broke up with me.”

“Huh?” Matthias raised an eyebrow. “Thought you said it was a really important thing? You seemed really happy! How’d that-” He cut himself off, seeing Lukas physically recoil from his outburst. “Fucking hell, man, I’m sorry.”

Lukas just sighed again and played with the buttons on his coat. “Yeah, well, guess I should’ve expected it. Look at me, I’m a fucking mess. Probably deserved it.”

“Hey! No way!” Matthias felt helpless. Sure, he didn’t know Lukas that well, but he was the prettiest, most charming, nicest – _stop it, you’re being a creep again_. Lukas’ self-deprecation didn’t at all seem deserved; just the previous night, he’d been happy and smiling and excited about his relationship. Whatever had happened _can’t_ have been his fault. “You shouldn’t blame yourself. I’m sure you did nothing wrong! It’s on them for not realising how awesome you are!”

Lukas snorted. “Yeah, right. I’m just an idiot, getting my hopes up for nothing.”

Matthias pouted. “Dude, don’t get yourself so down. If that’s the case, that just means it’s his fault for leading you on.”

“Hmmm.” Lukas leant back against the headrest, his eyes closed. He didn’t seem convinced. The following, crushing silence weighed down on both of them, an iron gate Lukas wasn’t ready to unlock.

Matthias nodded slowly. Lukas didn’t need to open up if he didn’t want to! _Fucking hell, Matt, he barely knows you. You’re probably just getting on his nerves._ Maybe it was time to try another tactic.

Resting his cheek on his hand, he changed the subject. “Nice to see ya here though! What’re you doing in the city? Don’t usually run into you.”

Matthias leant forward, flicking a stray strand of hair out his eye. Seeing Lukas – _sitting next to Lukas_ – on his otherwise tedious commute was definitely a welcome surprise, but he couldn’t say he wasn’t curious. He seemed better dressed than usual, though more scruffily, as if he’d been saving his best clothes but hadn’t had the heart to turn himself out so perfectly. His hair, usually neatly parted and clipped back, fell into his face, the usual cross-shaped hairclip hanging loose and low. Though the messy hair still managed to compliment him in a way Matthias had never even considered before, he couldn’t help but feel concerned. Especially since Tuesdays were Lukas’ day off – he better not have been planning anything stupid.

“Got a convention.” Lukas tapped on the window, watching all the buildings fly by as they neared the station. “Not really anything special. Just looking at flowers. As usual.”

“Flowers are cool! They’re really pretty!” Matthias smiled at him. _Almost as pretty as you are._ “You’re a florist, right? I’d love to be able to do something like that. ‘Stead I’m just stuck here banking.”

“True,” Lukas conceded. “I love what I do, but conventions are always noisy and crowded and…” He trailed off. “Banking’s a sensible job, though. Your parents must like that.”

Something about Lukas seemed to be put-out by the idea – a little flame of joy dying in a downpour. Matthias thought he heard a muttered _“I wish mine did”_ , but before he could ask, they were cut off by a robotic sounding voice. As the doors opened, he stood up to let Lukas out, catching onto his sleeve as he passed. Lukas turned around to look at him, eyebrow raised.

“Have fun!” Matthias grinned. It wasn’t much, but hell, it was more than he’d ever worked up the courage to say to Lukas before. The whole situation still felt surreal: Lukas, choosing to open up to _him_ off all people, sitting next to him, talking to him like a friend instead of just a stranger…

He winked, hoping it wasn’t _too_ much. “If you ever need anyone to talk to – you know where I am.”

Lukas flashed him one last, precious smile as he disappeared into the crowd.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look i have no clue how to write a second chapter uhhhhhh  
> hopefully norway isn't too out of character??? im not great with dialogue conversations r h a r d  
> definitely prefer the first chapter

**Author's Note:**

> alin is romania i wasn't even sure i should tag him or ice but uhhh am new and overly cautious so i did anyway


End file.
